From the category archives:
Mallika Sherawat
Why does Mallika Sherawat go out on a stupidity-overdrive every time she leaves the country? Be it her audacious sound-bytes, her hideous outfits or her ghastly makeup, Ms. Sherawat leaves no stone unturned when it comes to projecting Indian celebrities as among the crassest and most harebrained in the world.
A few years ago, Ms. Sherawat raised hell in Cannes with her shoddy recreation of a temple-dancer ensemble (read: cleavage bursting out from a teensy-tiny choli, and an endless slit running up to her nether regions). This year, Mallika made sure she was the most talked about non-personality at the premier of Quentin Tarantino’s Inglorious Basterds… all thanks to her tasteless wannabe-goth gown.
And if that wasn’t embarrassing enough, Ms. Sherawat is even planning to visit the Twitter HQ during her time in LA, to offer ‘inspirational quotes’ to their employees. Arrgh… c’mon Mallika, we thought you liked Twitter. Why torture them with your own homegrown spurts of trashy wisdom?
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If I have to define the word “imaginative”, I would say Mallika!
Now, this Haryanvi lady (she is much older than she pretends to be) is just a small town girl, with no godfather in Bollywood. Neither is she too beautiful, nor is she too talented and she hasn’t given a single Bollywood hit in the last…hmm… don’t know how many years.
But that hasn’t stopped our girl from imagining big, juicy roles ahead. She’s now hosting parties for Hollywood B Listers and discussing projects with big name directors. This is the girl’s best acting role to date! She does it so well she’s even fooling herself. Now that takes imagination!
Mallika honey, if ever you retire from your make-believe career in acting and show business, you can write a book on marketing and teach IIM students how to market skills that do not exist! You could finally enjoy success beyond your wildest imagination!
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Piggy Chops – aka Priyanka Chopra – recently cinched top honors in a recent survey on twitter followers. Statistics reveal that she beat down enthusiastic tweeters like Gul Panag, Mallika Sherawat and Karan Johar by a cool margin of 20,000 followers. Industry pundits expressed some surprise at Madame Sherawat’s defeat, especially considering her long history of being one of the oldest, and most regular Bollywood tweeters. (I am of course not surprised – had it been possible to share pictures on Twitter, Mallika would still be queen!)
So, while Piggy Chops chows down on her new found cyberspace victory, here’s some food for thought – do you really want to hear about artificially hyped-up, publicist-dictated updates that Ms. Chopra has been doling out in copious amounts?
I, for one, can’t wait for Ms. Chops to give up the goody-two shoes act and get down and dirty on her many rumoured feuds, flings and catfights.
Get ‘real’ Priyanka… the ‘check out my new movie’ tweets are getting really old, really fast!
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Mallika Sherawat topped the online poll conducted by indiatimes. com for the best cover girl. Now, what does this mean? It probably means that more Indians jerk off thinking about Mallika than anyone else!
This is no mean achievement. Way to go girl. Congratulations!
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Some people will do anything to stay in the limelight. Take Mallika Sherawat for instance.
This woman’s not had a release worth talking about in what seems like eons. But she keeps hogging precious print space by coming up with the most inane of ideas. The latest from the Haryanvi babe’s stable is that madam wants to insure her beautiful body for millions of bucks.
Huh? What beautiful body is she talking about? The artificially enhanced, surgeon-sculpted one?
Yeah Mallika, we’ve all seen those before-after pics of yours which make it amply clear how you’ve achieved those perfect curves. And they aren’t worth insuring anyway.
So quit acting like the diva you aren’t and let your movies do the talking for once!!
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Mallika wants her producers to insure her body just like Real Madrid insured Christiano Ronaldo’s legs for £90m!!
She made my day, she really did! Just imagine our Haryanvi babe in the league of Ronaldo… This is called thinking big!
But jokes apart, I think she’s right. When her booty’s all she’s got, she better take good care of it. But she can leave out the part above the neck, that’s quite dispensable.
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Check out the outlandishly dressed Mallika Sherawat at the glitzy premier of Quentin Tarantino’s latest film Inglourious Basterds in Hollywood, an event that was graced by the stars of the movie Brad Pitt and Dianne Krugar and the stylishly dressed Angelina Jolie.
What was Mallika thinking when she chose to make an appearance on the hallowed red carpet dressed like she had just stepped out from the sets of a c-grade porn movie. After spending days and numerous shopping trips to chic boutiques to choose a grand outfit for her majestic entry, this is what she turns up wearing, ha, ha, ha, ha….The end result- outrageous, yes. Classy, not in a million years!
In my opinion, Mallika deserves the Razz Award for the worst appearance ever on the red carpet.
How tacky Mallika, tch, tch!!
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Haryanvi babe Mallika Sherawat’s starry eyed behaviour at the House of Blues rock concert was appallingly disgusting to say the least. Her mouth shamefully dropped open and stayed open throughout the show. And even when she met rock stars Ozzy Ozbourne and Ace Frehely, it refused to close shut- yes, she was that star-struck.
Listen Mallika, we know you’re a small town girl who’s smooched her way to success (remember Khwahish ?) and we know you’ve never met any real rock stars before. But do you have to make it so obvious with that thunderstruck expression on your face?
You might pretend to be all chic and sophisticated Mallika baby, but your gaping mouth gave away your humble beginnings….how LS girl!!!
(source- Indiaglitz)
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